Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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