But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Randomize
