Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Randomize
