I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize