i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
