I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
