During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
