"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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