You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
