dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
