How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
