So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
she peed on how many people?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
