Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Let's get the cat blown out
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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