it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
