Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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