She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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