I wish i was in the wii world.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize
