What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
