note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
