i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
