She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
