Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
