I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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