You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
