I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
