The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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