If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Randomize
