She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
