Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
