marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
