she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
