we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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