I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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