what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
