Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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