You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Soap is not a condiment
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
What happened to fro yo and sex?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
