I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
