Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
