Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(908): View more from New Jersey

How wet are you?

(1-908): View more from New Jersey

Ever heard of a U-boat?

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(586): View more from Michigan

i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..

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(480): View more from Arizona

we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.

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(318): View more from Louisiana

Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.

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(651): View more from Minnesota

i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.

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(913): View more from Kansas

Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think

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(516): View more from New York

I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.

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