My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
