More tranny stories later!
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
i love accidental penises.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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