You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
