Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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