ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
