sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Randomize
