I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
