just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
So vagazzling was a success
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
