ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
