This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
