Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
